So for the umpteenth time I try to start, and hopefully sustain, a blog. Over the years I have tried to maintain several journals, both online and in the more traditional paper and ink form, but I have never been able to for any appreciable length of time. Looking back on all those years of starts and stops, of long silences, and frantic efforts to catch up, what stands out is the fact that I write the most, and perhaps the best, during the loneliest periods of my life.
During my first few years at the University, when I was a socially inept, painfully insecure adolescent (come to think of it, maybe I still am at heart), whose major preoccupation was how to hoodwink some hapless coed into becoming my girlfriend, I filled pages upon pages of a battered Cattleya notebook with my undoubtedly pathetic frustrations and longings. But when my prospects started to pick up — friends, a social life, and yes, that long awaited girlfriend (who to this day I am firmly convinced I did NOT deserve ;p) — the writing dropped off. Well I still did quite a bit of writing, after all, it was during this time that I started working for the student paper, but not in a journal.
Years, and many girlfriends later, I once again found myself in the social doldrums. A three year relationship had just ended (and rather messily at that) and as a consequence I was broke, homeless, and rather pessimistic about my life in general. And at that moment, reunited with the angst-ridden existence I thought I had forever left behind, the words started pouring out once again, ceasing only when, a year or so later, I once again achieved a certain conventional level of stability.
Given this history then, I am actually somewhat worried that the fact I am attempting to start a journal again means that something is wrong with my life. And with a wife, a four year old, and monthly car payments, even the barest hint of yet another crisis of meaning on the horizon is truly cause for worry.
Oh well, I suppose that if worse comes to worst, I can simply just go into another long hibernation.
August 10, 2007 at 5:47 am |
Allow myself to be the first to comment on what appears to be the beginning of your unpaid career in blogging. Your first entry, while filled with self-pity–or some semblance thereof–is remarkably well-written. Sure it’s indulgent but it’s a good read, especially for the likes of myself, always interested in the lives of others, to forget about his own life, which–to quote a hapless deadline beater we all know–is full of pain and suffering.
August 31, 2007 at 4:58 pm |
Blogging is practice for the more permanent print. I oftentimes rely on two keys: “backspace” and “delete”. I do so whenever this nagging demon hits me on the head and tells me to do better than my previous post/lazy sentence construction/quick facts with insufficient evidence…
Congratulations on your new column! Where is it? Mine’s on http://www.sunweb.com.hk/ once a month, or whenever my editor feels like posting the article online.
Cheers and felicitations,
mida
September 2, 2007 at 12:58 am |
hi barry. *wave*
September 2, 2007 at 12:38 pm |
Boojie,
I thought all that pain and suffering ended, let’s see, five years ago?
Mida,
Its on Commuter Express, which is distributed free at all fine MRT stations citywide. Not sure if it has an online version though. In fact, come to think of it, all I have is the word of my editor that it actually comes out. Now I’m worried.
Jae,
*waves back*
September 3, 2007 at 5:42 am |
Your response reminds me of a conversation I had with a old student of mine from the Geodetic Engg dept. I said, “With the train system picking up in Metro Manila, UP grads ought to use the MRT more often these days. ”
G asks: “Why?”
M replies: “Besides saving time and energy, how else can we talk to the everyday commuter and exchange ideas if not on mass transport? At least we’ll be helping our fellow Pinoy, albeit a small thing and the encounters brief.”
[conversation goes on]
M ends: “Yeah, I believe in mass transport. HK works that way. Even CEOs take the mini-bus up to the Peak because it’s inexpensive and efficient. No breeding of unnecessary self-importance on the road.”
Your column is right where the pedestrian-commuter conversation begins. My favourite political discussions, come to think of it, are with taxi drivers. Cheers!
September 11, 2007 at 5:15 am |
barry, uy, ang saya!
now, is there a way to bring that to bayani fernando’s attention. … err, wrong thread, but i like this post too
dang, we QC-only denizens will never get the hard copy of commuter express?
maybe you’ll be a reason to ride the train more 